Customer Tech Problem Report Form

1.  Describe your problem: ___________________________________________

2.  Now, describe the problem accurately: ____________________________

3.  Speculate wildly about the cause of the problem:

    __________________________________________________________________

4.  Problem Severity:
A.  Minor__
B.  Minor__
C.  Minor__
D.  Trivial__

5.  Nature of the problem:
A.  Locked Up__
B.  Frozen__
C.  Hung__
D.  Shot__

6.  Is your computer plugged in?                           Yes__  No__

7.  Is it turned on?                                       Yes__  No__

8.  Have you tried to fix it yourself?                     Yes__  No__

9.  Have you made it worse?                                Yes__

10. Have you read the manual?                              Yes__  No__

11. Are you sure you've read the manual?                   Yes__  No__

12. Are you absolutely certain you've read the manual?            No__

13. Do you think you understood it?                        Yes__  No__

14. If 'Yes' then why can't you fix the problem yourself?
    __________________________________________________________________

15. How tall are you?  Are you above this line? ______________________

16. What were you doing with your computer at the time the
    problem occurred?

17. If 'nothing' explain why you were logged in.
    __________________________________________________________________

18. Are you sure you aren't imagining the problem?         Yes__  No__

19. How does this problem make you feel? _____________________________

20. Tell me about your childhood. ____________________________________

21. Do you have any independent witnesses of the problem?  Yes__  No__

22. Can't you do something else, instead of bothering me?  Yes__

If you actually filled out this form you need to call our
"Technically Challenged Hotline" and read your answers to the support
tech. The number is 1-800 bite-me.